One reason why my ex husband and I are divorcing was because he wanted a third baby and I wasn't sure that I did. It was an odd time for him to try to get me pregnant when he was loosing his mind. He thought cars were following him everywhere he went and his paranoia was at an all time high. He was always slightly paranoid but it was getting pretty bad. So needless to say I wasn't all that excited at that time to have a third kid with him, which hurt his feelings I guess and he thought I didn't love him anymore. It wasn't that I didn't love him. I just knew it wasn't a wise move for us to try to have a third kid at that time.
Our first two kids were girls and he was quite disappointed both times that they weren't boys. I was perfectly happy to have had two girls. I always had a fear of having a son. I think mainly because my older brother put my mom through hell almost his whole life. He was difficult from day one not wanting to eat much and then in his teens he got into trouble in almost any way he could. Of course he had our dad for a dad so that was a huge disadvantage. This was cool though, in his 20's he enrolled in the National Guard which I was very proud of him for. He also got saved when he was 24. Although it didn't seem to stick, sadly. He has wavered all over the place in his faith.
But in all my jobs with kids from when I was 15 to 32 I had a hard time with the boys. They always had SO much energy and it was hard to contain them and make them focus. Every boy really could be said to have ADD. I realized that's why most boys struggle in school, because most teachers are women, and women just don't get boys. Back in the day, before school, girls would be home with their moms and help with cooking and cleaning and boys would go to work with their dads and learn the family trade from a young age. I wish we still did things that way. It's almost like we are trying to train all kids now to become teachers. There isn't much else you can learn from going to school, other then how to become a teacher. I realized the other day that I don't really remember anything I learned in school. That's probably why so many boys don't pay attention in school because they know their future is probably building houses or driving a truck, both being things that you don't really learn about in school.
So boys can be hard to raise and hard to teach. Anyways, overall I'm very glad we didn't have a third child, since my ex-husband seemed to have changed into a totally different person.
Before you consider having a baby with anyone, consider the cost, money wise but also emotionally, mentally and physically. You will for sure grow spiritually when you have kids, because you never need God as much as you do when you are raising kids. Which can be good, overall. But realize it will be very, very hard work. It's very key that you and your spouse are both sane, patient, competent and hard workers. And make sure you pray a Lot together when you become parents, because you will Need to. :)
God bless!
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