My Life Map

 My first real boyfriend died 9/11 of 2012. For that reason 9/11 has always been extra sad for me. We had an argument that night over a girl he knew, but I wonder also if his friend from work said to him, "Let's get wasted since it's 9/11" and then getting wasted killed him. Watch out for those crazy friends you might have. They just might cause you to die. 

Then I cried my eyes out for about 5 months. I went to Australia with a life insurance check I had through him. That kept me more happy then I would have been otherwise. Then I met my ex husband after Valentine's Day of 2013. We got married right away, like a week after we met. Why did I marry him so fast? Because I missed Roger who died. I missed having a partner to have fun with. I was living with a friend at the time, but she was kind of a depressed person. I wanted to have some fun so I married Ben, and we did have fun. We went hiking and bowling and played mini golf. It was a very happy time for me. 

Then our first girl was born in January of 2014. She was my little bundle of joy. I finally forgot about Roger dying. I prayed many times that she would turn one before I got pregnant again. Then 2 months after her one year old birthday, I was pregnant again with Joy, who was my other little cuddle bug bundle of joy. It was difficult to be pregnant and have a one year old, but God helped me get through it ok.  Joy was born in October of 2015. A week after she was born our lease was up at our apartment. I wanted us all to move to Austin to be closer to my mom. I figured I would need her help with now having 2 kids. My ex's mom wasn't very much help, but she wasn't retired yet so I'm sure that was why. So we moved to Austin, and life got a lot more happy for a season. We went hiking and swimming in lakes a lot. We explored every area of that city any chance we could. 

Then for no obvious reason, my ex went crazy. He just didn't want to be married anymore I guess. Maybe he wasn't attracted to me anymore. Maybe he never was. So he went insane and moved in with his parents. I asked them to take of Serenity because she was already there at their house for a week. I didn't want to fight with my ex over her. She was his favorite. I also let them keep her so he wouldn't commit suicide. I was very worried that he would at that time. Then a month later my mom told me they gave my oldest daughter 4 vaccines in one day. I drove out to rescue her, but ended up giving my ex's family my other daughter. I regretted that for a very long time, but I didn't have the money to provide for her. I don't know how any single mom does it. It must be super hard. My mom maybe could have babysat her so I could have gone out and worked two jobs, but I didn't really want to do that. We couldn't live with my mom and step-dad because they are in a retirement community that has a rule that family can only live with them for 3 months at a time. So I gave up my daughter. 

Then I had a few exes that didn't work out. Then I met my current man 1.5 years ago. We had a son this year. James was born in March of 2023. I figured he would replace my daughters, but I still miss them. Hopefully someday I will get to have shared custody with my girls. I want to see them on the weekends, maybe every other weekend, if my ex will allow that. Please pray he will be nice and let that happen, and that his mom will be willing to share the girls with me.  I would like to be in their lives again. 

I hope your lives have been easier than mine. May God bless you all. 😁