Tuesday, November 20, 2018
Profile of a Child Molestor
I knew a guy at church, he was one of my best friends for a year actually, and he turned out to be a child molestor. I never would have thought that he was. And I hung out with this guy a lot, at work and outside of work. I worked with him 30 hours every week at a private school. We went to Denny's with other friends every Wednesday night after church and our group did lots of fun stuff together. He was super great with kids. He seemed like a great guy all around. And then a shocking event took place. Most people who knew him still don't believe he did it and that the 5th grade girl made the story up. :( So sad.
For any wondering, the school was shut down after several accusation against him came out. And he went to prison. It was called Carden Heights and it was in Orange, CA. :( I was a Junior High English teacher and after school teacher there, and he was the P.E. and after school teacher there.
I read the police report a few years ago from what put him currently in prison. One day, when playing hide and go seek with the kids after school, he asked a 5th grade girl to pull her pants down. She didn't, but just that and her telling, and several other kids then told of incidents with them, got him put in prison for about 10 years. In the police report they noted also that they searched the computer in his work office at the school and even found videos he had of little girls pulling their pants down. I don't know if those were random girls or girls from the school. :( How crazy huh? What a crazy and insane story.
So needless to say I'm a little scared now to send my girls to school and even church. That is partly why I haven't gone to church much with my girls since my first daughter was born almost 5 years ago. It's a sick world out there, that's for sure. I can see why many moms homeschool now. I am still planning to send my oldest girl to school for kindergarten in 9 months, but pray for me to not worry about her to much! Thanks all. :)
On top of all that, this guy had worked with kids at church since he was about 17 as the leader of the 5th and 6th graders at chruch. Wow right?! Who knows how many kids he might have molested from age 17 to 25 when this huge discovery came out. It is insane to really think about, all the hundreds, if not thousands of kids that he had access to.
I knew a bit about this guy's life story. He was physically abused by his mom a lot. To punish him, instead of spank him, she used to dunk his head under water and almost drown him several times. One person noted this might have caused brain damage which led to him molesting children. That is quite possible. He did seem like he might have had some brain damage. He did not seem all that intelligent. So obviously he had a really messed up and crazy mom. As far as I know, he himself was never sexually abused.
What is really mind boggling also is that the principle of this school and the PASTOR of the church I went to KNEW of an incident with a 4 year old girl 5 years prior to this one and said nothing and did nothing. They still let him work with kids at the school and at the church! The school was owned by this church. Wow right! This was a pastor and a school principal of a somewhat elite private school. Not only did they do nothing, they LET this guy pretty much run the whole school for 12 hours every day! He was there from 6am to 6pm everyday. He was the before and after school teacher and the P.E. teacher and the socceer coach. Wow right? And he was alone with the 5th and 6th grade group at church EVERY Sunday and Wednesday night. Wow.
Which I guess is why the pastor and principle said nothing because they depended on him and his exceeding energy to motitor the kids for 12 hours a day every week day. But how MUCH does that show that both the pastor and the principal did not care about the kids at all and their safety? They may have thought God could reform him and he would be ok. And yes God could reform him, but people are realizing more and more now that if a child molestor molests a kid once, he will most likely do it again; it's only a matter of time.
This guy led a game for the junior high and high school youth group every single Wednesday night. He even taught the lesson sometimes! Talk about serious hypocrisy!
The really crazy thing is I, at one time, actually wanted to marry this guy. haha. That is the craziest part of this story really. I hung out with him all the time, and I was even fooled into thinking he was a great guy, for the most part. I could always tell that there was something off about him though. He was kind of a jerk to my best friend at times. If she sat down in worship at church he was a jerk about it. He was a bit overly controlling with the kids at the school. He seemed to be on a power trip with them all the time. Overall he seemed to care about no one but himself. He was very selfish. He thought he was amazing and there was something wrong with everyone else. Everyone else had a problem, but he never did. That is why sick people get even more sick, because they never think anything is wrong with them. They point the finger at everyone else but never analyze themselves. They never take the good long and hard look in the mirror that they need to so they can get better.
This guy was very, very immature at times. He would act like a kid often times. His hobby was working on a train set for hours and hours. He lived on Kix cereal and Sunkist sodas. He did not eat anything but that pretty much and he would go 12 hours without eating when he was at work from 6am to 6pm.
He had only had one girlfriend his entire life and that was when he was 18 or so. She broke his heart and he never tried dating again. When he was at work he was a controlling domineering type person with the kids. When he was out with his friends he turned into a 10 year old boy essentially. I thought of him as a hyena because he was so silly and crazy outside of work. But at work he carried himself and acted like he was a lawyer or a police officer. He took himself very seriously at work.
I did notice one suspicious thing one day when I was working in after school care with him. I worked with this guy 30 hours every week at this private school. One day it was just me and him and a cute 13 year old girl that were there still at the school. I was wondering after all this came out if she was a girl he molested 5 years before that, that our pastor and the principle ignored the story of. He was chasing this 13 year old girl around throwing balls at her and it seemed to me like flirting. I confonted him through an e-mail that he should be more careful to not appear like he was flirting with a kid. That he should not make things look bad. He was respectful in his response to me via e-mail.
But that was pretty much the only odd thing I noticed in a whole year of working with him in after school care around about 70 kids together every day. Pretty amazing. He hid his sickness very well from a ton of people. Very, very amazing.
I can't believe he was allowed to be alone with so many kids SO many times! What was that pastor thinking? What was the principle thinking?
And who knows how many more stories there are like that out there.
I don't know why God allows some men to get sick and do things to little kids. It's very sad. My own dad did stuff to me as a kid also. And I know of many other stories of adult men molesting kids, like "family" doctors molesting boys and pretending it's a medical exam but it's not.
All we can do is pray. Please pray! Pray for the kids of America and the world! Pray that sick men will NOT be allowed to work with cute, innocent kids in any way, Ever!
In Jesus name Amen. May God bless you all! :) Please pray. Thank you all :)
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