Jokes/Funny Stories

The first apartment I lived in had the worst carpet I've ever seen.  I bought rugs at Walmart to cover every square inch that I would have to walk all over there.  Then when I moved out I heard there had been a fire in there the year before.  Great!  And they didn't think to replace the carpet?  Honestly. :(
Another apartment I lived in there was a guy below me who threw parties almost every Friday night.  He and his friends would stand on their balcony, which was right under my bedroom window, talking until like 3am.  I asked them to be quiet politely many times.  My patio had wood planks spaces in between. One night I got so fed up I filled a mixing bowl full of water and poured it on my patio so the water fell on all of them.  They went inside after that. :)

In another apartment I was living on the bottom floor.  I had heard the bottom floor is the worst but hadn't really experienced it yet.  A lady living above me decided to walk EVERY where in loud cowboy boots. She would even get up at 3am and wear her boots to the bathroom which was right over my head.  It was very aggravating.

When I was 20 I tried to assemble a computer desk with my step brother.  It was the most simple design but we both wanted to give up about 3 times.  Looking back I can't believe I had a hard time with that.  Have any of you tried to assemble a kid swing or a kid toy?  There's like 100 steps!  And I struggled with the like 6 steps to assemple that desk.  Amazing. 

Have any of you tried to share a bed with a 1 year old?  They love to kick you in the stomach for some reason.  Or if your back is turned they kick your back a million times.  Ah kids....

After I had my frist kid I dreaded bed time.  Not because she might kick me a ton, she was in her own bed then, but I dreaded being woken up EVERY single hour of the night.  I really wished then that sleep was just not necessary for me.  And that's when coffee became my best friend. :)

Have you ever shared a room with your kid until they were 2?  My two year old would do a wet diaper flip flop about 3 times in the middle of the night.  Like she would toss and turn and flip and flop until I changed her diaper. :)  And my 3 year old, since she was about 1, screams about 3 times in the middle of the night like she got her arm chopped off.  Like seriously it sounds like her arm just got chopped off. But after I give her a bottle she's fine and goes right back to sleep.  But then I lay awake for about the next 2 hours because her screaming got my adrenaline pumping. Ah kids...  :)