Our Thought Life

I just joined a great women's bible study at my church. The topic is Me, Myself and Lies and it is all about thinking about what we think about.

Did you know every person has an inner dialogue of about 150-300 words per minute? This number may be less for guys however. There is a funny video series called "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage" on youtube and the pastor notes that most men have a "nothing" box where they do nothing and literally think about nothing.

Women do not have this nothing box lol. We are Always thinking about something, and usually many things at the same time. :)

We worry a lot. About things or people in our lives or the future.

I have always been a big thinker. I remember one time I was sitting somewhere deep in thought and my high school English teacher passed by. He noticed that I must have been thinking about a lot and he said to me, "Never stop doing that. Never stop thinking a lot." lol I thought that was funny.

But yes, I usually have tons of things running through my mind, hence why I write so much. :)

I also started writing when I was 10 or so, keeping a journal, to get all these thoughts on paper in a way to ease my mind I guess.

My journaling as I got older turned into training my mind I suppose; a way to control what I thought about. You don't really realize what you are thinking about until you write it down. Then you can see it in the light and correct any bad thinking, usually. :)

I have always been big on correcting whoever I am around if they say self-derogatory terms about themselves, like "oh I'm such an idiot!" I'm always like, "hey....positive self-talk." lol Because I've always known it is so important what we say to ourselves. Also, things like that are lies from Satan; lies that he tries to feed us because he comes to "steal, kill and destroy" us. :(

It occured to me in the class today that most of our inner dialogue comes from our parents, things our parents may have said to us while we were growing up.

I think a lot of times when someone hears a critical voice it may be the voice of a critical mother or father. Children are programmed very easily and quickly. The things we hear as kids will follow us or haunt us the rest of our lives, whether we realize it or not.

Luckily no one has ever said anything negative to me like, "You'll never amount to anything." etc. For someone reason it is boys that hear these messages more, which is very sad. The world is very hard on boys.

I know my dad was super critical of my brother and would say things like that to him all the time.

But everyone was very positive towards me. It helped that I excelled in most things I did. I was never teased at school. Family members never put me down.

Ok, there was one instance. My uncle who I lived with for a time in Hawaii was very mad at me one day and said I was scum.

But that is really the only occasion I can think of. Sure it hurt that day, but not after that because I knew that wasn't true about me. 

The voice of my grandma has always been stronger in my mind and she always told me, "God made you special, and he has something for you to do that no one else can do." That is what I have always believed about myself. :) Which has been very good, of course. :)

What people say to us can only affect us if we let it. We can choose to believe what they say or not believe it. If we do believe it, that is when the negative self-talk begins.

Think of the scene in Home Alone when he realizes he is alone and his family is gone. He plays back in his mind all the hurtful things they said to him the night before. I think we do that all the time, play back things people have said to us and possibly start to own them. But we need to prevent ourselves from doing that, before it takes root in our minds and begins to dominate our thinking.

Overall I was blessed with a wonderful Christian family who sought to build each other and up and never tear each other down. My dad's side of the family is Catholic but it helps that they still have a fear of God and so try to treat others with love and respect.

My favorite quote in the video talk today was "If you don't control your thoughts, your thoughts will control you." How true is that. Another reason to write down what you think, as a way to start to control your thoughts.

I love how Joyce Meyer said once that some of us need to talk to ourselves more. We need to put ourselves in check and take ourselves in a corner and talk to ourselves. :)

The mind is a like an unruly child sometimes, and it needs to be disciplined. The same is true of our stomach, which is where fasting comes in handy.

Another good quote, "If you sow a thought it becomes an action. If you sow an action it becomes a habit. If you sow a habit it becomes your character. And if you sow your character it leads you to your destiny." So our destiny, and where our life will go, starts with our thought life.

If you think you will never succeed at anything, then you probably won't.

What you think becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

If you think you will never find a good guy or girl to marry, then you probably won't.

You will probably find that you keep picking the wrong people, because deep down you don't think you will ever find a great person or you may think you don't deserve a great person.

I struggled with the later thought for a time, but I have been healed of that praise God. :)

But if you believe and try to stay positive, you just might find that all your dreams end up coming true. :) It's possible. There really is power in positive thinking. And it is God who enables you to think more positively, by the renewing of your mind. Amen? Amen. :)

In the video series Jennifer Rothschild said we all have a closet of the mind. In our closet are various things....

C....cares and concerns (such as worries, what if thoughts etc.)

L....our likes and dislikes (our opinions about various things)

O.......our objectives and goals (what dreams we have for our future etc.)

S.......Secrets (we all have our secrets....this is usually the most hidden and darkest part of our closet)

E....Eternity (thoughts about the after life, our purpose, God, why are we here, etc.)

T.....Treasures (things we value most, good memories, people we will never forget)

My cares and concern currently are, "Should I get a job? Will we have enough money? Will the baby be ok and be healthy? Where will we live in the next couple months? When should we move to Texas? etc."

My likes and dislikes are pretty simple currently. The only like I think about is that I like ice cream and I like hugging Ben. lol The only dislike I currently have is I don't like when Ben snores. lol but I don't give a whole lot of thought to what I like and dislike for the most part. :)

My objectives and goals currently are that I will be able to homeschool my kids. To get Ben settled in a career where he will make enough to support our future family. And that is about it. :)

My secrets....I don't have too many secrets. I don't have any really. I try to keep things open for the most part given the quote "You are only as sick as your secrets." lol I know Satan works in the dark and he works on our secrets to give us shame and guilt etc. So I try to not have any secrets that he can use against me in any way.

Eternity, this is the category I spend most of my time in, in my mind. I spend most of my time thinking about what God would want me to do, with my life, with my time. Am I pleasing him in what I do? What will heaven be like? When is Jesus coming back? Things like that. :)

Treasures....I suppose my good memories from the past. The main thing I thought of in regards to treasures is past pets I have had and how much I loved them. I have always been very much an animal person. So my main treasures have been pets. :) My bunny snowball, two kittens I had, other kittens I've had, my cat Jade that I had for two years, and my current chinchilla. Those are my treasures. :) Also kids I have worked with in the past that were really cute. Fun times with family on holidays and picnics we've had. Times of eating out in restaurants. I love eating out. :) Memories from when I was a kid of sledding or mostly things in nature. I spent a lot of time outside as a kid and have many fond memories of that. :)

So what is your thought life like? What things do you think about the most?

I will share more of what I learn from this class as I go. I think it will be very good.

May God bless you in all you do. :) Take care :)