We love all people but should we be friends with all people? What qualifies someone as a good friend to have?
It is true that we will become who we hang out with. We let the people we are around have influence over us, so we need to be careful of who we choose as our closest friends.
We know as Christians we need to try to not have close friends that are not Christian. The verse about being unequally yoked does not just apply to marriage, it applies to any relationship in your life. "What can light have in common with darkness?" "Come out from them and be separate."
Of course when you are working with non-Christians you will still be friends with your co-workers. Don't completely isolate yourself from those who aren't saved. But those we choose to go out of our way to spend time with, we need to, for the most part make sure they belong to the faith.
In some cases it's good to be friends with non-Christians in order to try to witness to them and bring them to the Lord. I had a friend who was a non-Christian for 10 years and I did finally get to help her make a decision to make Jesus the Lord of her life. Praise God!
But for the most part non-Christian friends will pull us down. I have experienced this many times. :( So we need to be careful.
Jesus did hang out with tax collectors and sinners, but the men he always had with him were his disciples. Our closest group needs to be people who mostly think like us and love God like us. "As iron sharpens iron so one man sharpens another." We will only be sharpened by other Christians.
Proverbs 13:20
"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm."We need to choose our friends wisely. And it is ideal to be friends with wise people, obviously. :) What qualifies someone as a fool? Someone who does not learn from their mistakes, but keeps repeating the same ones over and over. Someone who lies to you would definitely qualify. Someone who does not keep their word. Someone who is rude to you in any way.
We become who we hang out with. If we associate with wise people, we will become more wise. If we associate with foolish people, we will become more foolish. :(
Acts 2:42-46
"And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. Then fear came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were done through the apostles. 44 Now all who believed were together, and had all things in common, 45 and sold their possessions and goods, and divided them among all, as anyone had need.46 So continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, they ate their food with gladness and simplicity of heart."
This is the ideal picture of friendship. The early church members shared everything they had, and this was about 3,000 people, so that was a lot of shared items. lol :)
I think true friends will help their friends in need. We don't want to enable bad behavior, but if God is leading us to give something to a friend, give it.
Proverbs 18:24
"A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother."I have seen this time and again that when someone has A LOT of friends it will actually hinder and harm that person more than help them. It is good to have about 10 close people we can call on if we need to that all belong to the faith, but not hundreds. We don't need hundreds of close friends. The more friends, the more influence people can have over you, and you need to make sure that influence is good. It is better to be lonely than to be misled by others. It is better to be alone on the straight and narrow path than to be on the broad road that leads to destruction but have a lot people around you. We need to fear God, not man. We primarily need to obey God, not others.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken."This is my favorite verse relating to friendship, marriage, family etc. We are better with someone else than by ourselves. We can do more when we are united with others. There is strength in numbers. :) Satan attacks the lone sheep more often. Try to stick with other believers as much as you can. :) Do life with other Christians. Get in a small group.
My small group at the time happens to be a Celebrate Recovery program at my church. :) I have never been addicted to a substance, but everyone needs recovery from something. For me I joined due to my abuse.
We all need support. We all need to walk with other Christians. Then when we fall in any way, our friends can help us up. Very good! :)
I realized the other day that this is the first group of women I have been really this close with since high school, which was a good 10 years ago. It's hard to find a good group for sure, people you really click with. But pray about it and God will lead you to the best church and the best group that you will be able to connect best with. Praise God! :)
John 15:13
"Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends."The height of friendship is feeling like we would be willing to die for our friend. There are probably only two friends I could say this about, and then my husband, mom and brother. That is the greatest love, to be willing to die for someone else. Jesus modeled this for us in dying for us. Very rarely are we actually called to die for anyone, but the mentality of being willing to is good. It shows a kind of humility, a thinking of others as better than yourself.
Proverbs 27:17
"Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another."The process of how iron was sharpened back in the day was very hard. They would hit two swords against each other hard to sharpen them. Sparks would fly. It was a very vigorous process. God pruning us can be vigorous and painful at times. God uses others to help prune us. He uses others to speak into our lives, to call us out when we are wrong about something or doing something wrong. This is how we are sharpened by other Christians.
Proverbs 17:17
"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity."1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.Proverbs 27:9
Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.Hebrews 10:24-25
And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.1 Corinthians 15:33
Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”Galatians 5:9
"A little leaven leavens the whole lump."
Proverbs 27:6
Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.1 Peter 4:8-10
Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. Show hospitality to one another without grumbling. As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace:Proverbs 22:24-27
Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare.John 15:12-14
“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you.Romans 1:12
That we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine.Proverbs 17:9
Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.Proverbs 16:28
A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.Proverbs 27:10
Do not forsake your friend and your father's friend, and do not go to your brother's house in the day of your calamity. Better is a neighbor who is near than a brother who is far away.Proverbs 25:17
Let your foot be seldom in your neighbor's house, lest he have his fill of you and hate you.Job 2:11-13
Now when Job's three friends heard of all this evil that had come upon him, they came each from his own place, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite. They made an appointment together to come to show him sympathy and comfort him. And when they saw him from a distance, they did not recognize him. And they raised their voices and wept, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads toward heaven. And they sat with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his suffering was very great.Proverbs 27:5-6
Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.Luke 6:31
And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.Matthew 18:20
For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”James 4:4
You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.1 John 4:7
Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.Proverbs 25:19
Trusting in a treacherous man in time of trouble is like a bad tooth or a foot that slips.
Romans 12:10-11
Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord.
1 Samuel 18:1
As soon as he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.
No comments:
Post a Comment