Whatever Satan can do to get us to hate others, he will do it. God wants us to love others. Satan wants us to hate others, so he constantly tries to cause people to fight and not trust each other. Satan is called "the accuser of the brethren" for a reason. He accuses us to ourselves and to others all the time and tries to pit people against us. He tells us lies about ourselves to bring us down, and he tells others lies about us to cause them to fight with us. This is called spiritual attack.
But you can't believe the lies Satan tells you about yourself. You have to keep your head up. When he tells you your world is over or you can't go on, tell him he's a liar and you can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens you. Amen? Amen. :) When others try to tell you that you aren't doing a good job at home, work, as a parent etc. stand up for yourself. Believe that you are doing the best you can and don't let others bring you down. Satan keeps trying to bring us down, but don't let him. Have confidence and believe in yourself.
I love the line from a Will Smith song, "Just the Two of Us." "Oh aint no pain from the opposite sex. It's gonna hurt bad but don't take it out on the next son."
This is the case for any relationship in our lives. An ex hurt us so we withhold love from the next person we get involved with. We keep walls up. We stay guarded. We choose to not trust them. But does that benefit us at all? We think it does. Satan tells us it does. But in the end we are only hurting ourselves. Why? Because then we don't get to experience the fullness of what love can be.
Or maybe it's a boss or a co-worker that hurt us and so we choose to have a bad attitude with every single person we work with in the future, because we assume they will hurt us like our other co-worker hurt us. My dad used to always say, "To assume is to make an ass out of you and me." That is how the word is spelled. ;) You can't assume that just because one person hurt you that every single person will hurt you. That is no way to live life. If you never trust anyone, how can you have friends or love? You live walled up within yourself because you don't trust anyone else and you stay alone. You become hard hearted and jaded. You decide to turn to ice and be cold with others.
I know exactly what this looks like because this is what happened to my mom. She loved my dad but he molested me as a little kid and she then essentially turned to ice. She stopped loving anyone. It became almost impossible for her to love anyone after that. I honestly never felt like my mom loved me my entire life. It was like she was incapable of love, like her heart was dead. There were tiny moments when I felt that she loved me, but generally it seemed that she had killed her heart. She decided to kill her ability to love anyone else, because she stopped trusting people. She let herself turn to ice. Also she probably decided that the less she loved others, the less they could hurt her, so she decided to simply stop loving others very much. She became callous and tough. And I modeled that coldness for much of my life as well.
But no matter what happens, you can't entirely stop trusting people. Unless you plan to live in the wilderness somewhere, you have to learn to trust people again. Like a good country song says, "I believe most people are good." Do you? Or do you think most people are bad?
The tricky thing about that is whatever you assume people will do to you is generally what they will end up doing to you. If you assume everyone will leave you or hurt you, they very well might. "According to your faith it will be done to you," Jesus said. If you believe people will love you, they will. Why? Because you give out a confidence and that is very attractive. But if you think people will hate you, because maybe you hate yourself, you might end up Causing them to hate you. Then you might say "Well I knew they were going to do that." But you Caused them reject you, because that is what you expected, and so you caused it.
We bring about whatever we expect. This is what faith is. You can have faith in God, that he will bring good things into your life, and he will. Or you can choose to believe that bad things will happen to you, and then they probably will. Whatever you think will happen to you, is generally what will happen to you. If you think you will never find love again, you probably won't, because you don't expect that you will. Your thoughts and words do dictate your life.
People don't realize how powerful their words are. You essentially create your own reality through your words, and your prayers. Most people underestimate how powerful prayer can be. You have no idea how powerful prayer can be. But mainly what prayer is, is a training of our minds to want good things and to ask God for good things. You can bless yourself or you can curse yourself. You can bless yourself with what you ask God for in prayer or you can curse yourself with worry of all the worst case scenario things that will happen to you. That is why the Bible says when we pray "the peace of God that transcends all understanding will guard your heart and mind." Prayer keeps us from worry because we bless ourselves. We fix our minds on good things. We train our minds to want good things and to believe we deserve good things when we pray. Think about the Lord's prayer. What did Jesus tell us to pray for? Food. The ability to forgive others, which is to pray for peace. Did he tell us to pray for anything bad for ourselves? Of course not. Prayer is a setting of the mind to desire good things for ourselves.
A lot of people don't realize how masochistic they are. It's almost as if they WANT bad things to happen to them. Why? Because they think that's what they deserve. They hate themselves and so they cut their own feet out from under them all the time. They think others are causing them to fail but actually they are causing themselves to fail. They think others want them to fail but they are projecting their own desire for their own failure on others. Why would we want ourselves to fail? Mainly because a stronghold was built in our mind at some point by Satan convincing us that we deserve bad things.
Anyone who was sexually abused as a kid feels bad about themselves. There is this core feeling that you are bad and that all you deserve are bad things, but those are lies from Satan.
You have to activate your faith. And what faith is really, is believing that God wants to bless you. If you don't believe that, you should analyze if you hate yourself and if you really do want bad things to happen to you and why.
I hope this helped some of you. May God bless you all!
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