Catholics

 I looked into the life of Sam Smith to try figuring out why he did the Grammy performance that he did. He was raised partly in Catholic school. I knew it! My dad was raised in Catholic school for a while. I always wondered if that was a main reason why my dad got really messed up in the head. He ended up being a child molester and violated a few kids other than me. I know Catholics teach that any sexual desire should be ignored and stifled. That doesn't help people to actually ignore them. You just feel like you are in a cage, and you can't wait to get out and have some fun. 

I had a similar experience with my private Christian college. The entire time I was there, I was so sad about how all the guys seemed to be gay. They all seemed to have no interest in dating. Of course, it was partly that they invested a lot in that college, and they didn't want to jeopardize finishing over some silly relationship. I went there hoping to meet a great Christian guy to marry. Instead, they all seemed to be not interested in love or sex at all. That was both good and bad. We were all repressed really. No fun. No love. Or if there was any love happening, it was a huge secret. 

What happened to me after college? With the first idiot to show interest in me, I was all over him. I seriously regretted losing my virginity to him, but I was repressed for 4 years. I didn't even kiss a guy for 3.5 years while I was there. It was a very unique college experience for sure. 

I wonder if my dad and Sam Smith felt that way about their private school time also. You can't try to ignore your basic desires for too long. At some point you will just go crazy and swing to the total opposite side. All things in moderation. 

It is the same as people who try dieting and then after the diet, they pig out on lots of junk food. Then what was the point of doing the diet? There was almost no point. You can only suppress your desires for so long before you will lose control. 

As far as Catholic priests, someone needs to tell them to just get married. That would be a million times better than them molesting little boys, which I know still happens a lot. If they want sex, just pick a woman, and they can tell their church sorry, but it was a need that they had. Too many kids are getting molested by priests, and it needs to end. I am wondering maybe if Sam Smith was molested by a priest. I pray God will heal his wounds from whoever messed with him sexually. 

And may all of us who were messed with as kids, heal from our wounds. May any bitterness fall away from our hearts. May we learn to trust people in general again, and not just want to hide for the rest of our lives. May God help us to believe in the goodness of humanity again, at some point. And may Sam Smith stop worshipping Satan. He might think that will give him power and fame, but that is the worst way to go about it.