Choices

 This may sound odd but about 10 months ago God told me either I could start seeing my daughters every week, or I could be an artist. I chose to be an artist. That sounds messed up,  but that was my decision. 

What kind of artist? I was painting a ton at the time. Then I wrote about 10 books on great topics. Who knows what form of art I'll do next. I am working on a new book about my C Section. Maybe that one will be my number one best seller. It could happen. :)

I've always wanted to be a famous singer. I think that is still possible. Sometimes I like writing songs. 

Why did I have kids when I had so many dreams? I was willing to forget about my dreams for a season. I suppose every parent forgets their dreams for a long time, possibly forever. But having kids is worth it. What if you never could become famous? Then you are glad you didn't hang onto that dream forever. 

I hope my daughters are doing well. I pray for them every day. I hope someday they will both meet happy and kind Christian men that they will live with and be willing to love forever. 

If I ever see them again I would tell them, sorry I had to go live a separate life from your dad. He got to be too much for me to handle. His demonic possession was more than I could deal with. I hope your grandma kept you safe, even though you had to live with him. This world is crazy at times. Make a wise choice with the man you marry. I'm sorry that I didn't. And please don't become lesbian. 🙂 There are great guys out there. Just listen to your gut feeling about him. You will find a great guy eventually. I love you both very much. I will always cherish the sweet memories of when I was raising you both.