Mom Attachment

 This may seem odd, but every time my bf talks to his mom in person or texts her I feel jealous. Why do I feel that way? I now know why. Because my ex husband basically left me to go marry his mom. I have always heard the Oedipus complex says that every man wants to kill his father and marry his mother. Ewe...

Emotionally Ben was married to his mom his whole life. I never mattered as much as she did. He wanted me to look like his mom and raise my kids like she would. Ultimately I think he felt she should take over mothering my kids because he knew he liked her more. 

So I have mother in law issues. I really like my current mother in law though. She is a great person. But we all have our own baggage to deal with. The first cut is the deepest. 😣

When I met Ben, the doors on his closet were all over his room. I asked, "What happened to your closet doors?" He said, "Oh my mom said it looks better that way." To me that proved she was crazy. 

We lived with her for a few months before our first baby was born. She would pace the hallway at 2am and move things around. It may have been due to a medication she was on. I did not get why she wouldn't just go to sleep. 

One time we were going on a road trip to CA so Ben could meet my parents. His mom texted and called him non stop to try to stop us from going. Maybe she feared that we would stay there forever. I wish we would have. Maybe our marriage would have lasted longer. 

She babysat our two girls for one week so we could have a beach vacation. At the end of the week she texted me a text meant for her daughter. It said, "She didn't even ask how the girls were all week." I think she was gossiping trying to say I didn't care about my daughters at all. Gossip was her favorite hobby. 

And here I am basically gossiping about her. The moral to this story is, don't be an annoying mother in law. Respect it that your child needs to move on. You should not run their life anymore. They need to bond with their mate and let go of you, so let them. Cut off those apron strings and let your kids be adults.