I have not seen my 2 daughters in 2 years. The biggest reasons are that they live with my ex, who is 6 hours away from me, and I have been working a lot the past 2 years. It is also that I bounced around from my mom to my dad's house as a kid and I hated it, so I don't want to do that to my girls. It is ironic though, after I got pregnant my ex told me that if we ever didn't work out he wouldn't try to do shared custody. He just wouldn't see the kid anymore. I was thinking "Ok...." but now I am the one doing that. Of course I miss my girls and I'm sure they miss me, but there is not much I can do. If my ex and his parents don't want to share my girls with me, what can I do? This all made me think of how there seems to be this generational curse in my family. I was abandoned by my dad at age 6 when he went to jail. My mom was abandoned by her mom at age 9 because her mom had a mental break down and just checked out for a long time. My grandma was abandoned by her parents at age 2 when they dropped her off at an orphanage. This was all why I never wanted kids until about age 27. I think I was afraid that all this crap would happen to them. And they did have to go through what I went through, but I turned out mostly healthy and a productive member of society so I know they will to.
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