You never know what will happen when you love someone. People are free agents. They can choose to do whatever they wish to do. We are not robots and we cannot make anyone else become a robot. The more you love someone, the more freedom you will give them to do what they want to do. You will want them to be happy, more then just be with you. If being with you makes them happy, then that is the best place for them. But if they are not happy anymore, it is good to let them be free to be alone or to be with someone else.
I remember this concept was used in sermons a lot to explain why God gave us free will. Pastors would say that God gave us free will so that when we choose to love him, it would mean more, because we can choose to not love him.
When someone chooses to love you when they don't have to, it means a lot more. Some people manipulate others to be with them or to stay with them, but that is not really love. It is control. Love is not about control. Love only grows in freedom.
If you have to force someone to love you or to stay with you, they don't love you.
When I worked with kids I read a great quote, "If you don't have control, you become controlling." If you loose your confidence that you deserve for your person to love you, you might try to demand it, but that never works. If love cannot flow freely, it will not grow.
So give those you love the freedom to do what they want. You enjoy being free. Let them be free too.
No comments:
Post a Comment