It is very common that families become enmeshed, meaning they don't know how to give each other space. It is usually a mother or a grandma, probably because they aren't working and have way too much time on their hands. Women also always want someone to take care of. If they aren't taking care of anyone, it makes them go crazy. This is why so many people have pets. We all crave something to take care of.
The problem with being enmeshed is that it can lead to addiction issues. One family member wants to be close all the time. The other one just wants to escape and check out, so they do drugs or pills or drink excessively. They just want space. That is the primary reason they want to check out. The other one feels rejected but they should have not come on so strong. They need to see that the other person prefers to be left alone.
If you ever have to handle living with an addict, let them feel free. The more they feel in a cage, the more likely they are to use a substance to set their mind at ease. Trying to become to close to some people can make them feel locked up and greatly increase their stress levels.
It is hard to know in any relationship how much space the other person needs. Every person is different in how God made them. We all vary in how close or how distant we want to be from people. Usually it depends on how much a person has been hurt by others. The more they have been betrayed in some way, the more space they might want. They have to slowly learn to trust you and those around them. It isn't easy to trust people again when you have been surrounded by con artists. You don't know who is trustworthy and who is only out to get something from you. It is hard to tell who really loves you and who just wants to use you. Respect the other person's need to be free and not enmeshed. Then hopefully they will become more healthy, and you can have a better relationship eventually.
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